There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do
anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own Soul. One
does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the
darkness conscious. — C.G. Jung
What happens when we feel we have no choice but to end a long-term relationship because our soul tells us that we no longer can accept the limitations? Often times, we may still feel tremendous love for that person, but we know in our heart and soul that it is time to expand our consciousness, and allow ourselves the opportunity to grow beyond what we currently have known… thus, the Dark Night of the Soul journey begins.
In my upcoming book entitled “Hugging Trees in the Dark”, — (Finding the Courage to heal the Heart), I share with you my deeply personal experiences of my choice to end a 30 year marriage, sell my business of 24 years, and the necessary painful transformation of me; an awakening that shook me to the core of my being in ways that I couldn’t have understood or imagined.
An extremely painful journey filled with doubt, deep insecurity and the resurfacing of traumas that I thought were no longer in my head and heart. I had no idea that there was so much hurt and emotional shock that needed to be healed and integrated. I often felt as though I was hit by a force more powerful than me, and there was nothing I could do while feeling powerless to change it.
What do you do when you feel fearful of changing your life so drastically, and every fiber of your being screams with gut-wrenching insecurity….yet your soul whispers in your ear and the calling is greater than all the discomfort and fear you face… you take a courageous plunge into the darkness, an amazing leap of faith and trust that a life is only worth living when you are authentic and true to yourself. There really isn’t a choice as I see it, that’s my point.
I believe there is no greater gift that we can give someone than to be completely honest and expressive of our truth. It gives them a chance to look intensely inside themselves as we hold the mirror for their healing… that’s how it works.
When we truly love someone, they deserve our complete honesty even if we perceive it as hurting them because, in the “end”, they will grow too, and be
better people for it. Our ability to become increasingly more conscious and present in our relationships is what life and love is all about, without it…it’s just a game I do not wish to play. Life is so precious, I pray I will always remember that as I remind you…I love you, RJ